THE WATERING HOLE

Greetings! I am honored and grateful for Myron’s invitation to spend some time here sharing the joy and love I have found following the teachings of A Course in Miracles. Spirit flows here, where we are One.

Here is the part where I share with you how very qualified I am to be having your attention today. You’ll find no initials before my name to indicate that any institution has granted me ordination, coronation or to show my superior intellect. I’ve not conducted workshops, written a book, don’t have a MySpace page, and there is no internet website for the curious among you to define me.

I must tell you, this is quite humbling. I hope that what I lack in worldly adornments I can make up with by sharing a smile and a few of the observations Spirit shares with me through ACIM, Way of Mastery, and NTI.

All that I have to give you is my love of our Father, and my great desire to share that love with you. I think it was Jesus who mentioned that love is truly the only gift we have to give, and I’m overjoyed to do that here.

That’s it. I hope the one qualification that Spirit has shared with me glows as joyfully in you as I feel it. We have been given this tremendous treasure trove of love, and there appears no way to keep it hidden. My joy is to share it with you, and I thank you for allowing me that opportunity.

Simply,
Sonja Spahn

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Mon Aug 10, 2009

Come on in, the water is fine

When I started my Spiritual quest in earnest several years back, I was fresh off Gary Renard’s Disappearance of The Universe.

Thanks, Gary, I am truly grateful to you!

Through this book I would be re-introduced to A Course in Miracles, would meet Rev Myron Jones via the Internet and would gather the most loving and Mighty Companions one gal could ever have a happy dream about. This path has opened the doors to such a profound life-changing peace and unconditional love in so many ways that as it says it the Bible “my cup runneth over.“ I could never have imagined what fun and what joy I would find in this journey. I kept focusing on the destination, but looking back on the last few years I know now, the joy truly IS in the journey.

But, I digress.

The story begins at the beginning, right after beginning my ACIM studies.

I shared with many fellow Renardians (a humourous term for the Gary followers that sprang up after that first book) a kind of deep depression that I was not where I wanted to be in my Awakening process. At the time I believed I was “going” somewhere, needed to “achieve” something, and I wanted it NOW. Run, don’t walk, to Awakening was my message. Do not pass go, do not collect $100, go straight to Awakening NOW.

Never mind that I had no idea what Awakening even was! It was described as the ultimate destination, a place of the most...the crowning glory of all. And I was more than a bit impatient to arrive. Depression sprang up when the realization came in that this journey appeared as if it was going to take some time, perhaps even a few lifetimes to achieve.

I received several gifts during that time which helped to Enlighten me on the Awakening Awareness Process.

My daughter was in high school and a dedicated athlete on the swim team. She served then, as now, as quite an inspiration for her mother. She began swimming in her freshman year and came in last in almost every race in every Swim Meet she competed in. I thought perhaps she would, as I thought I would have, quit… after continuing to give her all but not achieve any of the glory of the “winners” of the race.

Instead, she practiced all the harder.

Swim Practice was held every day, Monday through Friday, after school until around 7:30 at night. Melanie would arrive home, exhausted and ravenously hungry. After dinner, she had homework. She was taking honors classes, and while she worked hard she was no genius and had to give school work all her focus in order to come up with decent grades.

It was a tough four years. In time, her dedication paid off. In Melanie’s sophomore year, she began to do a bit better in the competitions. By her junior year, she managed to place in a few races. By her senior year, she was one of the fastest swimmers on the team, and could be counted on to “win, place or show” in most of her events.

The four years taught me as her mother how much dedication one could give cheerfully and without grievance when one’s heart was intent on following one’s dreams. Let me repeat that. She never set any goals for her self other than to be the best she could be. She simply loved it. She loved the friends, the practice, the improvement she saw in her performance and was proud when she did well. Other than that, she put no pictures on the outcome.

Spirit used that example and gave me a dream which put it all in the perfect Conscious perspective which parted the clouds of depression on being “unawake”.

I dreamed that I was standing around a swimming pool, and the water inside the pool was Consciousness, Awakening, the Enlightenment I so was yearning for.

I wanted to jump right in that pool, all at once, and BE in the pool of Conscious Awareness, and started to dive in.

Jesus appeared to let me know it was not time. “You will not be able to withstand the temperature of the water”, Jesus seemed to tell me. It will take some getting used to first.

Instantly, my mind was shown my daughter, practicing day in and day out, in her pool.

I knew that this is what I would be doing as well, until I could grow accustomed to the temperature of the water of Awakening.

My Mind would need to be practicing with Holy Spirit, day in and day out, just the way my daughter practiced in her pool. My practices would include daily ACIM readings, meditations, lessons, hours upon hours of mind-watching, and forgiveness, forgiveness, forgiveness. I would attend workshops, teachers would appear, I would read volumes of books, some I loved, some not so much. I would listen to what seemed to be hundreds of hours of CDs by teachers I adored and some I couldn’t even stand to hear.

When Spirit saw my heart was not in the same place as my words, I would be shown that this was only “going through the motions” and then I’d have to forgive that, too!

Being impatient by nature, this seemed as if it was so much work.

But a funny thing happened along the way. While I still yearned to “dive in” the pool of Conscious Awareness, I stopped thinking this “practice” was work. I started feeling as if it was “normal” and forgetting to do so was not. I still behaved then, as well as now, un-mindfully, but I no longer felt guilty after I noticed I was doing so. Now, I just realized where I find happiness, and then went to that place where Holy Spirit abides as One with me and all my brothers.

When a situation in my life came up, I became accustomed to asking Holy Spirit’s advice, guidance and council on the subject. I spent many hours asking Jesus questions. I came to rely on those answers more than my own. Any situation was open for asking Holy Spirit “what is this for” because I came to know that on my own, I had no idea. Wandering through the maze of this world of my own ego, I was lost. With Holy Spirit Guiding me, I could see the lesson, short-cut to the answer, which was always some form of healing.

Not that I always WANTED to do so. I still insisted on doing things my way, and enjoying all the hellish nightmares that gp with that. But the journey is it’s own reward, and Spirit adjustment comes more and more easily now.

I am not there all the time by any means, sometimes I forget any of the things that bring me happiness. But my happiest moments, my moments of greatest peace and joy and clarity, are found in the mindfulness, and so I have found myself going there more and more. Now, not because there is any “practice” involved, just because that is where I am most at home.

This…it seems is what is meant by “the joy is in the journey”. Each bend in the path and each fork in the road brings a deeper understanding of living as Love.

Now, only one question remained. In the dream that Spirit provided on diving into the Awakening Pool, the temperature of the water was a symbol for the state of my mind. Temperature was the focus, not practice makes perfect, which is an easy message for Spirit to convey.

Why did Spirit use the metaphor of the water’s temperature? I’ll share the answer with you in the second part of, Come on In, The Water’s Fine!

Posted by: Sonja Spahn on Aug 10, 09 | 12:53 am | Profile

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Fri Jul 31, 2009

Awakening Stories by Roy Henslee

One of the few memories of my paternal grandfather who passed away in 1957, was the day he took me to the big Watermelon festival in downtown Luling, Texas.
The live pony rides did not impress me as I had already ridden a “real” horse that was actually taller than the person leading it around. It was the boat ride that held my attention from the moment we arrived in the “just for kids” area. Real boats obviously made just for kids since no grown-up could possibly even fit into one. Real boats, in real water, with real steering wheels navigating through an artificial moving river.
Grandad bought me a ticket and I got into the line. I could see the entire ride. Kids, just like me, driving the little boats through the circuitous course and then being helped out onto the dock and another kid being helped into his seat. I had no boating skills but Grandad must have had confidence in me; and the other kids didn’t look any smarter than me; no fear, just that I-have-arrived feeling. I will be in control and will perform at least as well as the other kids.
MY TURN!
An uneventful boarding and departure from the dock was accomplished. Both hands on the wheel, I made the first turn flawlessly to port, turning the helm gently, to make sure that I did not embarrass myself by banging into the sides of the river. All eyes were on me, I could tell. The next turn, to starboard, came upon me almost immediately and that is when IT, happened. I decided to start my turn early but the helm did not respond! Brief panic with ever increasing less gentle turns on the wheel. No response! I turned the other way, (why not?), still no response. ( I had not yet learned how to curse like a sailor but it is a skill that I have since honed to perfection just to handle events like this in later life.)
I WAS NOT DRIVING THE BOAT! All those other kids, smiling, laughing and spinning the wheel on their vessels were not in control either. Are they idiots? Is this just a big joke on me? I looked for Grandad and saw him standing out there watching my dilemma. He was smiling! It was a loving smile,( not the type of smile my brother had when he would put mustard on my food.) So, this is not a joke on roy, it is just the way it was supposed to be from the beginning.
I sat through another turn, not even touching the wheel. This was a test of my conclusions. Yes, this boat was going to make every turn perfectly whether or not I touched the wheel at all. Again I looked at the other kids, happily spinning their non-functioning wheels. They were happy to be pretending to be in control.
I put my hands back on the wheel and spun it without discrimination, left and right just to show whomever was watching that I was aware that I had no control. It seemed important to demonstrate to my audience that I was no idiot. I think I might have realized now why the kids that were finishing their rides before me had no qualms about vacating their vessels and turning it over to the next skipper. The ride now was only going to be as fun as I was willing to make it. I got into the game at that point; very near to the end of the ride. I began my famous motor-boat noise with my lips. I saw myself catching up with the boat in front by turning more sharply into the bends in the river. I rocked back and forth, just feeling the sense of the sea beneath the keel. I was finally having fun. And I was NOT driving the boat.
I would like to say what an important lesson I learned that day; I would like to continue here telling how profound this experience was; but now I have to go mow the yard.

Posted by: Sonja Spahn on Jul 31, 09 | 11:19 am | Profile

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Fri Apr 24, 2009

The Trip

This morning’s meditation brought up the following cute little story about today’s two review lessons. I am grateful to Holy Spirit, who is witty and wise, and tells a story so much better than I do. I offer it to you in the Spirit it was given to me.

Suppose you were going on a long trip. What would you bring?

Is it a vacation? Will you be a tourist? Is it a business trip? It is a funeral, a wedding, a family reunion?

Will anyone you love be joining you on the trip? Will folks who know you pick you up or meet you at the airport holding up a sign with your name on it? Will you have someone who you can call upon to guide you through your trip?

Imagine now, just for an instant, that you are Spirit, abiding in God, and choose to experience a little fantasy trip on planet earth. In order to do so, it will be necessary to pretend to have a little human adventure, a little separation from Divinity. It isn’t really possible to have a “trial separation” from All That Is, so this will be where I (to quote the song) “take a trip and never leave the farm”, except in my mind.

And on this trip, this little fantasy, when I arrive, I will have…..amnesia. I forget who I am, why I am here, who I am meeting and most importantly, how to get back home.

Yep, total amnesia.

And, that appears to be exactly what I’ve done.

Page 17 in A Course in Miracles tells me… “The Bible says that a deep sleep fell upon Adam, and nowhere is there reference to his waking up.”

And in this deep sleep, this deep amnesia, I have forgotten…everything. All That Is, however, gives me clues to bring with me in my adventure, a memory manual, given to by my Guide, The Holy Spirit.

Who Am I? Finding myself here, before I can answer any other question, I must first answer this.

My Memory Manual, A Course in Miracles, answers perfectly:
I Am Spirit
Today’s idea identifies you with your one Self….We state again the truth about your Self, the holy Son of God Who rests in you, whose mind has been restored to sanity. You are the spirit lovingly endowed with all your Father’s Love and peace and joy. You are the spirit which completes Himself, and shares His function as Creator. He is with you always, as you are with Him.

I am Spirit. Now, exactly what am I doing here? What is my purpose?

Lesson 98 and review lesson 114:
I will accept my part in God’s plan for salvation.

What can my function be but to accept the Word of God, Who has created me for what I am and will forever be?

p. 174
How happy to be certain! All our doubts we lay aside today, and take our stand with certainty of purpose, and with thanks that doubt is gone and surety has come. We have a mighty purpose to fulfill, and have been given everything we need with which to reach the goal. Not one mistake stands in our way.

Give Him the words, and He will do the rest. He will enable you to understand your special function. He will open up the way to happiness, and peace and trust will be His gifts; His answer to your words. He will respond with all His faith and joy and certainty that you say is true. And you will have conviction then of Him Who knows the function that you have on earth as well as Heaven.

And, most importantly, now that I remember who I am, what I am doing here….how do I get home? To find my Guide, I turn again to the Spirit’s Ticket Home, The Whole and Holy Spirit:

Clarification of Terms, Chapter 6.
“His is the Voice for God….The Holy Spirit is described throughout the course as giving us the answer to the separation and bringing the plan of the atonement to us, establishing our particular part in it and showing us exactly what it is. …
The Holy Spirit is described as the remaining Communication between God and His separated Sons…
The Holy Spirit abides in the part of your mind that is part of the ChristMind. He represents your Self and your Creator, Who are One. He speaks for God and also for you, being joined with Both….He seems to be a Voice, for in that form He speaks God’s Word to you. He seems to be a Guide through a far country, for you need that form of help. He seems to be whatever meets the needs you think you have…

The Hour grows late. I am ready to be home again.
Epilogue, page 91, assures me that my trial separation was not real, that my home awaits me, and I am eager to share it with my loved ones, and abide in All That Is:

“Forget not once this journey is begun the end is certain. Doubt along the way will come and go and go to come again. Yet is the ending sure. No one can fail to do what God appointed him to do. When you forget, remember that you walk with Him and with His Word upon your heart. Who could despair when hope like this is his? Illusions of despair may seem to come, but learn how not be deceived by them. Behind each one there is reality and there is God. Why would you wait for this and trade it for illusions, when His love is but an instant farther on the road where all illusions end? The end is sure and guaranteed by God. Who stands before a lifeless image when a step away the Holy of the Holies opens up an ancient door that leads beyond the world?”

Posted by: Sonja Spahn on Apr 24, 09 | 2:02 am | Profile

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Sun Apr 19, 2009

A Purpose Filled Life

I am overjoyed to be here with you today, as I’ve found a very treasured gift to share with you.

It has taken some time to find it, as I had misplaced it. The gift was given to me on Monday, March 18th, and I promptly hid it in a special place so I would be certain to have it when I needed it.

Unfortunately, that special place has continued to elude me. I looked in A Course in Miracles to find it. I googled for it. I searched NTI. I read The Spiritual Teachings of Ramana Maharshi. I listened to Way of Mastery, I went to Holy Spirit. All to find where I hidden this gift.

On Monday morning, after having attended Nouk Sanchez and Thomas Vierra’s powerful Take Me To The Truth gathering, I got a very clear message to remove all distractions and live a purpose driven life.

That is the gift from Spirit to you through me. If you are short on time, or attention, you can stop reading now. If you are Aware of the truth of that message, we can all form a Conga line and do the Happy Dance wearing our Awakening Party Hats and blowing our Enlightenment whistles.

When the initial euphoria has faded, someone is bound to ask the obvious. What does that mean?

Folks have been asking this same question since that first Sage sat with the first student, no doubt around a fire in a cave somewhere and asked “How many goats does the fire god demand I sacrifice each day so that I might spend endless moon cycles free from the teeth of the beasts which consume us”?

What is “purpose”? How does one awaken each day with a mission, a Divine to do list that details each and every movement in each and every moment to match, step for step, the purpose God has given us? How does one discern distraction versus purpose?

The joy, it would seem, is in the journey. It was dear readers, a Divine Scavenger Hunt!

Bill Thetford, who along with Helen Schucman brought the A Course in Miracles forward, certainly epitomizes a life lived in purpose. Bill especially found profound peace from the Course’s teachings, so surely he must have had the answer. I smiled when I read this quote from him while doing an interview for a magazine article:

“Actually, I always thought that a Higher Authority must have goofed in selecting Helen and me for this assignment. When Helen asked the Voice once why she was chosen for this role, the answer she got was, “You’re obviously the right person because you’re doing it.”

For those who are interested, the word purpose is used 663 times in the manual for awakening, A Course in Miracles. In Chapter 19, The Attainment of Peace, we read,

“You came this far because the journey was your choice. And no one undertakes to do what he believes is meaningless. What you had faith in still is faithful, and watches over you in faith so gentle yet so strong that it would lift you far beyond the veil, and place the son of God safely within the sure protection of his Father. Here is the only purpose that gives this world and the long journey through this world, whatever meaning lies in them. Beyond this, they are meaningless. You and your brother stand together, still without conviction they have a purpose. Yet it is given you to see this purpose in your holy Friend, and recognize it as your own.”

In the final statement at the end of the Workbook, we are given a clear direction on what activities are to follow:

“This Course is a beginning, not an end…No more specific lessons are assigned, for there is no more need of them. Henceforth, hear but the Voice for God…He will direct your efforts, telling you exactly what to do, how to direct your mind, and when to come to Him in silence, asking for His sure direction and His certain Word.

(Workbook, page 487)

In The Holy Spirit’s Interpretation of the New Testament, or NTI, a “metaphysical interpretation of the New Testament, scribe Regina Dawn Akers addresses purpose many times. I was Guided to these selections :

NTI 2 Corinthians, Chapter 1, v3-11.…

“Everything that comes to you comes to you for your healing. There is nothing that you experience that cannot have that purpose if that is the purpose you give it…”

NTI Galatians, Chapter 5, v16-18

“Yes, live by the Spirit. That is to live by your willingness. It is not more complicated than that. In fact, it is very simple.”

Jeshua Ben Joseph, from Way of Mastery, shares that when the mind has truly awakened from illusion there is nothing left but to be a servant of the Atonement and the only question left to ask is… Father, how may I serve”?

I went to Holy Spirit, my Inner Guide who had been mum on the subject, and received the following metaphor:

When an artist is creating an animation, the process appears to flow naturally when the final movie is viewed. But on careful inspection, it is a series of the same picture repeated multiple times, with only the slightest shifts in the character’s depiction. A foot may move only millimeters from one frame to the next over and over again just to show the character taking a step. To move a character in an animated illusion, hundreds of small shifts take place. But in each individual frame, the character has not moved in any way. He has not gone anywhere, not done anything, has not completed a journey. Only the illusion of a journey has been created. When one views the final product, the perception is that a journey has happened. In fact, the character figure never moved off the page.

To move in purpose would seem to be the same process. Without doing anything, without any journey, we repeat over and over again a small shift in our Inner Awareness. Surrendering to, rather than causing anything, we look at the place we are at right now, not at a place or a state outside of our Inner Kingdom, or off of the page we find ourselves on in that instant. We do not, in fact, ever move off the page.

To live in Purpose, we repeat the same actions. That culmination of many small shifts, truth by inner truth, lessons learned in the Scavenger Hunt of Divinity, that move the character of our consciousness, when viewed from Eternity, as a Fluid, Divine, Infinite Extension of our Father in Love.

As if by Divine Orchestration, Regina Dawn Akers, who is sharing her teachings from Ramana Maharshi, posted this message on Saturday. The message was perfect, timely, and ended the Divine Scavenger Hunt on how to live a life fully in purpose:

Seek Self before you go to sleep at night.
Let the search for Self be the first thought when you awaken.

Inquire for the Self as you eat your meals.
Be aware of the Heart as your hands are working.

As you recline, contemplate the Self.
As you walk, carry your Heart with you.

Never let your attention stray from your love of Self
or your inquiry of it.
Let this be your one purpose,
and live life fully.

~www.reginadawnakers.com

Posted by: Sonja Spahn on Apr 19, 09 | 10:49 am | Profile

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Sat Mar 21, 2009

The Blind Man and the Elephant

Hello and welcome to first installment of the Watering Hole. I am so grateful to Myron for her invitation to share insight and inspiration here. And in honor of all our Mighty Companions, the first Watering Hole is authored by none other than Roy Henslee. Roy is an amazing and consistent teacher, and has penned a beautiful short story.

His beautiful story deserves to be shared, and I am honored to present his gift to the world.

The Blind Man and the Elephant – Chapter 2

This day started out just as so many, many others had started and I had no reason to think this one would be different. I awoke to the sounds of activities of people moving nearby and hunger pains in my stomach. Sitting up, I drink the last of the water in my jar then move the few paces to the doorway to await my friend who always accompanies me these days. I never mind waiting, it is something that I am pretty good at even if an hour passes by; like today; before I hear my friend’s voice call me to join him.

Today, we are not going far and even with the wait in line at the well to re-fill our water jars we made it to today’s destination in what seemed like just a few minutes. We were at the wall just outside the temple gates. The wall was as familiar as my old friend, the cripple, who accompanied me. We have both spent many days, and unfortunately some nights here and this was often a rewarding place to be. Today was sounding like it was going to be one of those good days. Idle chatter of the people around me let it be known that the Master was already inside the temple and many visitors from all around would be passing through “my” gate today.

I immediately and without ceremony or conflict set up my territory against the wall at what would be a very good spot; fairly close to the gate and the warmth of the morning sun told me that by the heat of afternoon I would be in the shade. A full water bottle meant that there should be no reason to leave and possibly lose my spot. I sat down comfortably and placed my beggars bowl in the basket formed by my crossed legs. I then began the practice of what I am so good at; I waited. Each time someone passed, I would lift my bowl to my chest and smile with an inward positive affirmation that this one will pause and drop a gift into my always empty bowl. It was always empty because it does not take long for one to learn that treasures can disappear from a bowl just as readily as they appear. Children often attempt to distract me just for the purpose of reaching in to retrieve anything that I had carelessly left there. I am no fool and am very aware of the ways of the world.

I was here and committed to staying. This was my only function today since my next meal regardless of how long the wait, would be acquired here.

By the time the sun was highest, I had only received one small scrap of food, and that was from my generous cripple friend who shared the wall next to me. I was confused; so much activity passing me yet nobody paused. The conversations were not idle but seemed to be mostly arguments about senseless unimportant topics. Maybe this lack of compassionate generosity was due to the excitement of the Master being present. I would never know.

Presently a group approached from within the temple and my heart beat increased as they all paused in front of me. My best smile and upraised bowl was presented; I never spoke words since my purpose was obvious. But one within the group spoke to me instead of just making a desired sound of something hitting the interior of my bowl. The man was close enough that I could tell by smell of incense that he was a monk. Shit! The revered ones NEVER drop anything into my bowl and never even give blessings without holding both my hands together with theirs; leaving my bowl unattended for way too long for my comfort. My smile never faltered regardless.

“You are blind, is that so?” he asked. The sense of free falling hopes of food coupled with the assault of the stupid question almost had me respond with biting sarcasm. Instead, I stayed in character and said, “Yes, I have been unseeing since birth and rely on the compassion of my brothers for my life. Can you help me?” My best smile was again presented.

“The Master has need of you blind man, and has sent us to bring you to the inner courtyard where you will be instructed as to how you may be of service.”

Fear struck to the very core of my being. Lose my spot on the wall? Lose my way among strangers in a place I have never been? I once again resorted to what I was so good at. I waited.

“Come with us now,” he said, “There is plenty of food still available from the feast and you will be taken care of.”

“Please help me up and guide me, I will be happy to be of any service that is within my meager capabilities,” was my immediate reply. Even leftovers from a monk feast had to be better than what I had received for the day. My cripple friend remained silent even as I departed surrounded by incense reeking chattering monks. I would bring back to him a bit of food from whatever I was to find inside.

Ushered along by the monks, we never entered into any buildings but instead made three turns into an interior courtyard with the clamors of what must have been hundreds of people. The talking stopped abruptly as soon as I was among them. My senses went on full alert. Anticipating the smell of food and wondering which direction that was to be found I was disgusted to smell something repulsive and familiar. No doubt - my heightened search for food smell was at once overpowered by stench of elephant! Fear once again. Fear of hunger continuing; nobody in their right mind would keep an elephant in same area as food. Fear of injury; the cripple told me his story many times of the pain that he suffered from his elephant encounter. Always stay clear of them he warned me; they are unpredictable and dangerous. I wondered if my spot on the wall was still there and if I could return to it unguided.

I was then gently guided by a single monk slowly toward the stench smell. He then took my hand and raised it palm up and placed an object within my grasp but continued to hold my wrist even as I held the object. A voice then spoke loud enough for everyone in the enclosed compound to hear, yet apparently meant just for my ears. “We have placed an object in your hand;

Tell us the nature of this thing you have.”

Now, as I said before, I am no fool. Standing obviously this close to elephant stench, it must have something to with that vile beast; but the gentle but commanding voice did not ask me to speculate, no matter how logical it sounded to me.

“This object in my hand is much like a rope!” I raised my voice with these words, trying to respond in kind to the tone of the question. My very formal answer brought laughter from all sides just like I hear frequently from around the well when somebody holds the pull rope out of my reach. I am used to this sound; laughter prompted by seeing something obvious that I am not aware of. This was totally unexpected here in the temple among the pious and perhaps even the Master himself. Anger replaced fear, and hunger was forgotten completely and instantly. I threw the rope thing down and took two exploring steps backward, away from the smell.

“YOU PROMISE ME FOOD AND BRING ME HERE TO BE OF SOME SERVICE. YOU HAND ME AN ELEPHANT SHIT SMELLING ROPE AND ASK ME A QUESTION TO WHICH YOU ALREADY KNOW THE ANSWER. THEN YOU LAUGH JUST LIKE THE FOOLS AROUND THE WELL THAT DO NOT CONSIDER THEMSELVES PIOUS AS YOU DO. I WISH TO LEAVE NOW WITH OR WITHOUT THE FOOD YOU PROMISED.” This angry speech came spontaneous and loud. Very loud and becoming the only sound within the courtyard before the first echoes came back to my ears. The total silence continued well past the end of my plea to depart.

The silence was gently broken, not by laughter or voices other than a few whispers, but by a shuffling of footsteps, not coming toward me, just the sound of many people rearranging their places. One and only one set of footsteps approached me slowly and deliberately. A gentle hand on my shoulder and a voice I shall never forget in my ear.

“Come with me friend and we shall learn together what this was all about.”

I would have listened to this voice all day and felt that I had accomplished my life’s work and the willingness to follow would have turned to unbearable punishment if I was not allowed to do so.

I was led through the sounds of scores of shuffling feet and wafts of incense into a cool interior quiet room. I was given a cushion to sit upon and handed tea and food.

That same Voice spoke again, “The monks were given a lesson about how little they know about what they think they know and you were a great help in this lesson. Please forgive me for any discomfort you might have experienced in this process. They were not laughing at you my friend, they were laughing at their own disappearing ignorance. I will now give you a gift and you will then see what many of the monks gathered here will sadly not see before the end of many lifetimes. I could guide you around that elephant whose tail you accurately described as rope-like until the touch of your hands gave you an idea of the its overall nature; but this would not be helpful. At best, you would come away with an idea no better than those that see it as an object with the perception of eyesight.’

I listened, completely absorbed even seemingly within the words that he spoke. It was as if I were hearing thinking and anticipating the words even before their sounds came to my ears. It was me speaking to me and yet more than that. The sound of the words then stopped but something else began. An overwhelming sense of oneness with this loving teacher began to arise as a sense of knowing. He began to share with me at some level beyond the senses, an understanding of everything that I experience and the reasons for those experiences. I was shown elephants; I knew that they were elephants but yet they were no more significant than any of the other objects of my vision. Everything seemed to be connected to everything else yet more than that - everything was part of everything and I was part of that. I was that which I was being shown. The room I was in then came into my mind as if in a dream but I knew that I could touch this dream and it would have form. The Master sat before me with a knowing smile; I saw this, I saw this but not with the eyes that my friends use to guide me through the city. I saw this as part of me and part of all that is. I felt like I had truly awakened for the first time and the world around me was a creation of magnificent beauty and it was all created just for my own wonderment. This vision was within me and had absolutely nothing to do with that sense of sight that others so often pitied me for not having. I am complete and whole. I am part of all that is. It was given to me then that I always was this and will be this eternally. We sat together in silence for some time, just sharing this sightless vision.

The Master then asked me a question with words,

“If you were the teacher and I the blind pupil, how would you begin to teach me the nature of an elephant or even better yet, the color named red?’

Once again, waiting was the key. I had no words to answer the Master but the answer came to me in that silence and it was instantly shared without words either needed or possible.

“You are indeed now a Teacher,” he said, using words once again. “The gift you now own is a gift you give yourself. It is the gift of compassion. All of the pupils that are sent to you will be truly blind until they have seen with the eyes that you used today. You, of all my teachers will never pity a blind man but you will instead see him as yourself who has not yet gained Sight.”

Posted by: Sonja Spahn on Mar 21, 09 | 1:21 pm | Profile

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